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December 6, 1989, Chicago, Illinois“I’m going to need another person in January,” Elyse said. “That’s especially true with Mario getting ready to hire a consultant in Pittsburgh. The consulting billing and receivables alone are getting to be a full-time job.”“Would you consider a suggestion?” I asked.“Sure.”“Chris Gibson from Belarus Tractors in Milwaukee. She’s not happy in Milwaukee and wants to move.”“Are you still sleeping with her?”“No. She wants to, but ever since Jessica came back, my interest has been limited.”“Kimmy and Abbie, basically, though there were April, Patricia, Katy, and Lauren.”“But those last two are done. Lauren because she’s clearly a lesbian, and Katy because of her relationship with Lauren. Patricia is done because of Jorge. April was fun, but I don’t want another long-term thing. And Kimmy is over and done with.”“You think she’ll stay with her new guy?”“It seems like it, yes.”“So it’s really just Abbie then?”“Yes. Though we actually spend a lot more time. I suppose I was afraid it wouldn’t work - or that it would. But my curiosity was getting the best of me about why it worked, so I pulled my little tool kit out of the drawer and took the back off the remote to see if I could locate a processor or a memory chip, maybe learn it from the inside out.When I pulled the back off, I was totally dumbfounded! It was empty. I mean, I could see the little knobs on the underside of the buttons that were supposed to activate the sensors, but there were no sensors, nothing except the battery slots. No wires, no circuit board, no nothing! Of course, that was impossible. If there was nothing inside, it couldn’t possibly do anything to my TV!Could it?As I sat there feeling confused and totally creeped out, I had a passing concern about my own sanity. As far as I knew, there had never been a history of mental illness in our family, nobody going off the deep end and imagining things. I’d be the first.But NO, damn it! Everything else around me was.
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